SATIRE; Recently, People Who Never Served In The U.S. Military, Are Criticizing Military Service Of Others

Friday, August 9, 2024, 10:30 A.M. ET. 1 Minute Read, Satire, By Ryan Metz: Englebrook Independent News,

MANHATTAN, NY.- Once again, all across the internet and legacy media, guys from all across the country (the vast majority of whom have never served themselves) are weighing in on the service of two former soldiers in productive arguments.

     These arguments are based on which of the two former soldiers’ service doesn’t count. By all accounts, they have elevated the national discourse in general and highlighted the enormous respect for American servicemembers that politicians universally claim as a personal trait.

     The profound and impactful arguments are often found in the comment sections of news articles and tweets, whose authors have been so enraptured with patriotism that the posts invariably contain numerous spelling errors and erroneous details that authors got from another impassioned post. Said one guy with absolutely no military experience whatsoever. “Yeah…ok, I guess it’s ‘normal’ for guys to retire after only 20 years!!!!”

     The powerful statement inspired vigorous debate as to whether it was in support of one of the former soldiers or, in fact, a slight against the same soldier.

     The dialogue that these arguments have stirred often evolves into discussions about topics that have no connection at all to the original argument, underscoring just how valuable and important these arguments are for American society. Said another nameless guy who nobody knows or cares about, “THE CIA NEEDS TO RELEASE THE KENNEDY FILES NOW!”